The Best eCards for That Friend Who Never Responds to Texts
(But Still Likes Your Instagram Stories, So You Know They’re Alive)
We all have one.
That friend who vanishes into the void the second you hit “send.” Your message gets delivered, ignored, and spiritually ghosted—yet somehow they still manage to like your meme five minutes later.
You could get mad. You could triple-text them into oblivion.
Or you could weaponize humor with an unhinged eCard that says “I see you.”
Sending a funny, passive-aggressive (but still weirdly loving) eCard is the perfect way to call them out while making them laugh. And lucky for you, Unibrow specializes in that exact flavor of emotional chaos.
Let’s talk about the best eCards to send your emotionally elusive bestie, and why it’s way more satisfying than another unread paragraph in your chat bubble graveyard.
Why eCards Work Better Than Texts for This Kind of Friend
Texting them is like shouting into a canyon.
You know they’re alive—you’ve seen them post a Story, like a thirst trap, and share an oddly specific Spotify playlist—but they haven’t replied to you in days.
The problem isn’t that they don’t love you.
It’s that texting you back requires energy, executive function, and a clean emotional kitchen. And they don’t have that right now.
But an eCard? That’s visual. That’s theatrical. That’s a low-effort dopamine hit in their inbox with none of the guilt.
You’re not demanding a response. You’re just dropping a little chaos bomb that says, “Hey ghost, I still love you.”
The “I Miss You But I’m Being Hilariously Petty” Collection
If you’re trying to reconnect with a non-replier who swears they’re just “bad at texting,” send them one of these:
“This Is Me Waving at You from the Group Chat You Haven’t Checked Since 2022”
Visualize yourself as a forgotten soul in a digital wasteland. Add sparkles.“You’ve Opened Instagram 37 Times Today But Not My Message”
This one stings. It also heals. Like lemon juice on an emotional wound.“Blink Twice If You’re Still Alive. Also, Text Me Back.”
Equal parts concern and sass. And honestly? Effective.“I’ve Sent This Card Because I Care. And Because I’m Petty.”
Because sometimes love wears clown makeup.
These cards don’t just nudge them—they slap them with glittery sarcasm and remind them that you are funnier than their notifications.
For the Chronic “I Meant to Reply!” Friend
This friend is full of good intentions and unfinished messages. You know they started to respond. You know the typing bubble was there. You know they just… didn’t finish.
Let’s hit them with eCards like:
“This Is Your Friendly Reminder That I’m Still Awesome”
Just in case they forgot. They didn’t. But still.“You’re Still My Favorite Even Though You’re a Communication Dumpster Fire”
This one lands best if you include an actual dumpster with hearts around it.“I Forgive You for Not Texting Me Back, But Just Know I’m Better Than Everyone Else in Your Life”
Confidence is a love language.
Why It Works: You’re Meeting Them Where They Are (In the Inbox They Actually Check)
You know what your friend will open?
Their email. Or their phone notifications. Or anything shiny, colorful, and slightly ridiculous that looks like a distraction from their responsibilities.
Unibrow eCards are:
Fast to send
Impossible to ignore
Absolutely not subtle
They don’t require typing a paragraph or navigating emotional nuance. They’re just loud, funny, and chaotic enough to cut through the fog of burnout, distraction, and digital clutter.
Basically: eCards say what your texts want to say—but better, weirder, and with a frog in a tracksuit if needed.
One Click to Call Them Out Lovingly
Here’s the magic: you’re not guilt-tripping them. You’re not demanding. You’re just showing up in a way that says:
“Hey. I noticed your silence. I’m still here. Also, this dancing alpaca wants to know why you hate me.”
And that makes them laugh.
And maybe, just maybe, it gets you a reply. Or at the very least, a heart react.
And sometimes? That’s enough.
When Texts Fail, Send a Digital Sucker Punch
Funny eCards from Unibrow let you stay connected with the emotionally exhausted, the chronically overwhelmed, and the vibe-curators who haven’t replied since Mercury was last in retrograde.
